The Dream - TreAnna B.

The Dream        

By TreAnna B.

            I had a strange dream last night, and yet the more I think about it, the more I wonder—was it a dream?

            When I woke up I was sitting in my window seat, my latest book fix laying face down on the floor. Since when did I fall asleep reading? Very strange indeed, and more proof to make me wonder...was my dream just that or was it something more.

            I frowned. What had I been thinking about before? I bent and picked up the book, Beauty and the Beast. It was dog-eared on my favorite part: in the movie Beast and Beauty would be dancing while “Tale as Old as Time” was being played. I sighed.

            Now I remembered what I had been thinking about before I had dozed off. My boyfriend—and by that I mean the lack thereof.

            It was kind of pathetic really. I am nineteen years old and I've never had a boyfriend. Never been on a date. Never had a first kiss. Nothing.

            Maybe that's why I wanted the dream to mean more than it had.

            I stared off into space, trying to recall in as much detail as possible, what the dream had been about.

*                                  *                                  *

            I was standing in a room just as big and beautiful as the ballroom in my book, probably even more so. A gigantic crystal chandelier hung in the middle of the ceiling, which was at least a hundred feet in the air. Around me floor to ceiling length windows surrounded me. It was odd, because I can't remember if there was any light coming through them or not and yet I know it wasn't dark.

            The floor I was standing on was a swirling mosaic of golden tile. I could almost close my eyes and imagine dancing with my prince. I sighed as I longing swayed from side to side.

             Suddenly a figure appeared before me. I couldn't see his face. It wasn't covered or anything but I don't remember ever really seeing it.

            He took me by my hand and led me in a graceful dance across the floor. It was just like dancing with my dad—there was that feel to it.

            After our dance had finished, He smiled at me. And in that moment I knew...I knew. This wasn't my prince charming at all. This was indeed my Father, but not my earthly one.

            He stood before me, smiling endearingly down at me.

            “I don't understand.” I said quietly.

            He shook his head sadly at me. “No, Anna, you don't.”

            I looked around me and my heart sank to the pit of my stomach. I felt a sort of emptiness envelope me as I thought back to Beast and Belle. They were together when they danced on this floor. Almost immediately I lowered my eyes in shame as I tried to banish such thoughts from my mind. Here I was standing before my King, and all I could think of was how I didn't have a boyfriend.

            “Anna.”

            I looked up at the sound of my name. He still smiled at me with the calm loving gaze of a parent. “You can tell Me what's wrong. You know that I will listen to anything you have to say.”

            I nodded. “It's just...” I sighed. “Why am I the only one in my group of friends that doesn't have a boyfriend? Why have you forgotten me?”

            When He answered, His voice had grown even more gentle. “I haven't forgotten you, Anna.”

            I clenched my fists beside me as tears burned my eyes. “Then why am I alone?”

            I could hear the sigh and then the gentle rebuke in his voice even as He answered, “Be thankful, I hold your heart. I have taken extra care to find the perfect man for you, for your heart is fragile and frail. I know you cry for other's pain. That you hurt when they hurt. That's how I made you. The reason why I haven't placed it in another's hands yet is because he's not ready. Be patient, my child. Your time will come.”

            At His words, I could no longer contain my tears. They fled down my cheeks in streams, even as I tried to hold them back.

            “Anna.”

            He pulled me into His arms, hugging me tenderly. When He let go He said, “You are a very special girl. I made you in My image. You are beautiful, kind, and loving. I am glad that you have decided to wait for Me to place your heart in the hands of a young man who is ready to receive it. Many girls don't want to wait that long.”

            “But I didn't want to wait that long.” I wiped the tears from my face. “I do trust You, but I...” I faltered in my excuse.

            “I know. You did turn away from Me for a moment, but when I called out to you, you took My hand.”

            “It's so hard.” I said quietly. “To see my friends with their boyfriends...knowing that I don't have one.”

            “Do you think they're relationships will end happily?”

            I looked up sharply. “What do you mean?”

            He was frowning.  “Anna, unlike you they didn't want to wait for Me to deliver the right one into their hands. They will go through many many boys before they finally decide it is time to listen to Me.”

            “I'm not afraid of heartbreak.” I said quietly.

            He smiled back at me. “I know.”

            “I know that if I begin to date, I'll probably get my heart broken. I'm not afraid of that.”

            “What else?”

            “And I realize that you can take me from that broken road.” My eyes widened in realization. “You can if...I...let...you...” The reality of that hit me hard and fast. My face flamed. No that I had said it, I realized that it was true. But still, I wasn't quite ready to let go so easily. “But still...why can't I get a boyfriend?”

            “Because you aren't ready either.”

            Once more I felt an immeasurable emptiness inside me. “But I am.”

            He shook his head. “Do you trust me, Anna?”

            I frowned. “Of course I do.”

            “Then trust that I am preparing someone very special for you.”

            I still wasn't quite ready to do that though. Although I believed everything He had said, part of me still wanted to rebel. Out of the corner of my eye, I could just see a shadow—not mine and certainly not my Father's. I frowned as I turned my head towards it.

            I could see the shadow smiling as if willing me to continue my argument, to come closer...to doubt.

            I turned back to Him and said quietly. “I want to wait. I want to. It's just so hard.”

            “Do you not remember what I said in My Word? I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. But that's only if you let Me.”

            I nodded. “I think I'm beginning to understand.” I let go of all doubt, of any insecurity I had. Deep in my heart, I knew that He did have someone waiting for me. I needed to wait on Him. “I'm sorry.”

            Once more that fatherly smile was on His face, gentle love radiated from Him. “Know that I am listening, Anna. Whenever you feel like you are being driven into despair or temptation, I am here and I will help you.”

            I nodded. “Thank you.”

*                                  *                                  *

            I smiled as I came out of the trance once again. I didn't think it was a dream any longer, and even if it was, I believe it was sent to me for a reason.